Linus, Lucy & Woodstock

I had a moment as I was sitting on my porch, enjoying the cool calm before the rain, and checking m e-mails, so I decided that I would post some pics of my kids that I just took. :) Just a brief update on my babies...

Bought with the precious blood of Christ!

I am in awe today as I remember what my Savior did for me so many years ago on this Good Friday. As our guest speaker, an amazing completed Jew, reminded me at church last night..."We can't taste and enjoy the sweetness of redemption until we remember first the bitterness of slavery." Well I remember it all too well and that is why today I am so blessed to tears! He saved me...and not because of righteous things that I had done, but because He loved me! I am humbly amazed!...and I stand a bit taller only because I am bowing a bit lower.
I was reading the Gospels today as we have been going through the Holy week this past week, and I was reminded yet again of how beautifully that they really do fit all together. Just as the Passover symbolizes His body broken for us by the bread, so His Resurrection symbolizes His newness of life to us. Some of Jesus' last words were, "See, I make all things new," as He was riddled in blood, sweat, darkness, my sins, and tears! Oh my! His death enables me today to sit here today, read His Holy Scriptures, and type this...all the while as I watch a loving and stunningly beautiful cardinal bird couple flirt, eat, and flitter with one another (yes, I made up that last word!) I'm gazing out my window at these two birds, my dogs frolicking close by them in the grass, Linus literally prancing in our bluebonnet garden, butterflies flittering by, and the taste of Spring in the air! Hallelujah! I rejoice this Easter b/c His death has brought me life, I know that my Redeemer LIVES, evil has been defeated, and b/c of His death, I can face tomorrow! Thank you, Jesus!
Happy Easter, friends! I love you! :)

Catching up...

First things first, today is my little man's 2nd birthday!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, my sweet little LINUS!!!! Mommy promises not to poison you with steak this year like she accidentally did last year! I love you! :)

Man, I feel as if I have been very incognito. I went to Florida for Spring Break with some of my family and Ryan and it was nice to get away. We did the whole Disney World route with the fam, and then Ryan and I snuck away for one day where we headed to Clearwater beach. That was beautiful! I would insert some pics but I took over 300 so I'll spare you and me the time. If you want to check out some though, look me up on facebook. All in all it was a good time (except for the fact that I got sick the last 2 days, only to find out when I returned home that I had the flu.) Yuck! Last week I was laid out with fever and felt awful the entire week! I am finally on the mend now and trying to play catch up. I have 5 papers due today for YL too-and I'm not finished! : / With all that said, I think I actually have a bloggable moment to post. :)

This past weekend, after my fever finally let up, I was tired of living like I was in a hole of solitary confinement so I turned on the hot tub and decided to take a dip. It was a cool night as another cool front had just blown through and I was talking with the Lord. I told God how I figured this was probably our last cold snap and that I was sad to see the Winter go. As much as I love the sunshine, beaches and the heat of summer, I also love the Winter too (esp. when our summer's heat up a bit too much.) So I was voicing all this to the Lord when I felt I heard Him say just this: "My child, I am so happy that you enjoy my Winter's , but that is only a season that must too come and go so that I can grace you with Spring, Summer, and also Fall. They all matter." It was at that point that it hit me...My "winter" was coming to an end! You see, for the past few weeks I had been talking with several different friends in regards to how they felt that they were in a "wintery" season and they felt stuck in a rut and wanted out, but they couldn't completely sense God moving. I was able to share with them that I know what it was like to be there. I had spent the past few years there. But my "spring" was finally here and as grateful as I am for His light bursting through, I don't regret my "winter" now. Actually I kinda miss it. There is such intimacy encountered as you wait on God. He is all you have. But now, after my hot tub experience, I realize that He is just as near now and I need Him just as much! So I stepped out of the hot tub that night with great hope for me...and for my friends. I proceeded to lay down on the ground and gaze at the stars. Such beauty awaits you when you take the time to sit, behold, and do such a thing. I gladly welcome Spring now! And I am so excited to celebrate Easter this next week. Thank you, Jesus, for dying for me, so that I too may die to self in my wintery seasons and live with you in my spring's! I love you!

I'm now off to write a paper and play catch up...

A good day

Prepare for a marathon of a run-on sentence....My bible lays open on my lap; a cup of hot, yummy coffee sits on my desk to my left; my belly is full from all the yummy junk that I ate at the fun rodeo the night before; I am also reveling in the joy of the day that I got foster parenting a baby chihuahua yesterday; I'm also sore from working out yesterday (I love that feeling); rose scented candles are burning; only the dim lights of my lamps are lighting my way on this dreary day; the window's open as I watch it lightly rain; the only noise I hear is the rain and birds chirping a beautiful song (including my Woodstock); I see 2 cardinals out my window (which for some reason aren't only extremely beautiful to me, but also so represent Jesus to me); my dogs are quiet (only b/c they are eating my shoes...but I'll let it slide so I can have some quiet); I have no where to be in a hurry any time soon; and all the world is still, peaceful, and quiet before me...Aahh...Pure bliss!!!! I love occasional days like this! I love them! Jesus and I are having a moment and I just had to share it with you! :) He is speaking to me on how to fight for your God-given destiny! There is such balance in it. But don't we all sadly struggle with balance? I know that I do. You see, we can just rest in the fact that God fights for us and do nothing. But then we lose sight of the fact that there is in fact a roaring lion of an enemy seeking to destroy us so we must stay on guard. But then how do you stay on guard without losing sight of the fact that the battle is the Lord's. I think I came to a bit of an understanding during my quiet morning, and all from the great book of Deuteronomy. You see, Deuteronomy 33:26-29 (and Psalm 35:10, etc.) speaks of God Majestically coming to our aid! And then you have Deuteronomy 5:32 & 33 which speaks of what you are called to do! (with props to Proverbs 31 devotional and Beth Moore's, Praying God's Word devotional.) Here is what I think (at least this is how it happened with me somewhat.) After you have accepted Christ, I believe that God gives us a grace period in our "mountain-top high" as we discover who He is and who we are in Him. But then, of course, the enemy comes trying to nag us with our flesh patterns, and we begin discovering just how in need of a Savior we really are. So the battle hits and we begin the purifying process. As we mature more, we begin to look more like Him and understand a bit more, but we also grow tired. But the thing is, the enemy is using only the same old tricks. He is not as clever as we give him credit for. If you just take a look at your family line, you will see the same things that he likes to use over and over, It's generational sin and it must be stopped! But how? That is where I find myself today. I am mostly aware of the webs of generational sins that the enemy has weaved through out my family lines and I have fallen prey to. I have broken free from many...To the glory of God! However, there are some that I feel I will never be free from. And I woke up the other morning realizing that I had forgotten that the enemy didn't want me too. I had given up and forgotten that our struggle isn't against flesh and blood, but against the ruler of the air...our enemy. I was mad at my family, not him. But then I quickly remembered that not only am I fighting the wrong people, but that verse which says, "Judge, and you too will be judged." So true...ouch! What will judging them get me? The same thing that they have now...still the the noose of the stronghold, but held with a bitter heart. I want something different! And I am no different than them! So, I thought, "I can't fight. Fight for me Lord." And then I found myself in a world of defeat as I lay there. I have to take up my sword too. The thing is, I got a shield and His name is Jesus! As Deut. 5 states, walk in God's ways, don't turn to the right or to the left. Well, I had been relying on other refuges. I was allowing the enemy to distract me. God alone is my refuge and He has given me everything I need for life and Godliness! I have hidden His Word in my heart that I might not sin against Him. So I have a choice to make, dating all the way back to the Garden (thanks for the reminder, Mary Ann)...Choose each day...Life or Death. And with each choice you make towards life, God will fight for you. Like Job....it was after he prayed for his friends and chose God that God stepped in and (for the most part) said, "Ok, enough enemy! He is mine and I will take care of him." Amen! I am ready! Wow...this was a lot. But I think it is the start to my book. We shall see...

Welcome Spring!

Welcome Spring...I love you so! It truly is the most beautiful time of year here in Texas in Spring! However, I can only enjoy it limitedly due to the fact that I am an allergy geek and my allergies are in high alert in Spring. But I love the...bluebonnets, warm sun shining yet cool breezy nights, fresh flowers that begin popping up all around, new birth, the season of Lent, yellow butterflies which begin to re-appear, and marshmallow peeps! :) Happy Spring friends!
P.S. So my spiritual disciplines have already been tested today. I awoke this morning at 9:45 to my exterminator standing over my bed. Hello! Not only was it extremely embarrassing b/c I'm in my pajamas, in bed, at 9:45a...but...I also graduated from High School with this guy! Ha! And I'm living in my parents backyard pool-house at 29! After hurrying and scooting my un-clothed self, my bird, and my dogs out of the house, I opened my Bible to find God speaking to me out of Proverbs 6:6-11 (about the sluggard.) I laughed so hard! God truly does have a sense of humor. I felt no condemnation either. Just truth and I laughed. I did however have time to still do my QT before my day started late. Fortunately, in YL you work with High School students so due to the fact that I often have late nights with them, I can therefore excuse my late morning starts. Enjoy God today in this Spring weather! He is so much fun! :)

A little Spiritual discipline is so worth it...

God has been teaching me about Spiritual disciplines lately. You see, when Jesus first changed my life around for Him, I began to develop the tendency of legalism. It became a prideful noose around my neck so I have sought to rather walk in is grace more. But lately I have seen that I have been "walking in His grace" a little too much. I live my life constantly "on the go." Part by choice, and part not (as that is life in the ministry of Young Life.) Well lately, with that already chaotic lifestyle that I lead, I have been waking up too late, then I would check my phone first off and get caught up in my "to-do's" first and therefore get side-tracked, then I wouldn't have my quiet time, instead I would read the scriptures in order to get a lesson for one of my YL venues that I was teaching at that day (horrible thing to do), then I'd later find myself getting grumpy with irritating people, then I'd wonder why, then I'd get mad at myself for getting grumpy, then I'd seek to stop doing so on my own, and then I'd realize it was probably b/c I didn't start my day off with the Lord, but by then I was "too busy" to do so, and so I would say that I would have my QT tomorrow morning, but then remind myself not to get too legalistic again, and then wake up too late the next morning again, and on and on the cycle has been going...!!! Well, I didn't seek out a book on Spiritual disciplines. Nor did I seek to "be disciplined" on my own. Rather, last night I just realized that I had had enough! Our weapons are not against flesh and blood but rather against the ruler of this world-Satan, and he was trying to distract me from some freedom in Jesus that I need! No more! Sometimes we all get to that point where we shout..."Enough!"...and mean it! I was at that point and I needed some balance in my life of walking in His grace, and also, all the while, obtaining some spiritual disciplines, for crying out loud!!!! :) I didn't have a plan but God did. I decided to turn my phone off last night before I went to bed, I awoke a bit earlier this morning and didn't turn my phone on yet, nor open my computer. After I got myself and my brood of animals going, I put on a pot of coffee and knelt down before the Lord in prayer. When my coffee was ready and my prayers were at a "to be continued" point, I grabbed a cup of coffee, rushed off to my desk and began to open the scriptures. Aahh...it felt good to be back! It was like the sun was shining again! And I felt some order to my chaos. Just as God brought order to our formless, chaotic, devoid of life world in Genesis! It's a wonder...right? Ha! :) I sit here now pondering a scripture that God has had on my heart since Tuesday. Zechariah 3:1-10. What a perfect depiction to me of what Jesus did for us on the cross...esp. during this season of Lent...which I love! I encourage you to go and read it today and get your own word. Walk in your robe of righteousness today! If you are His, you are already clothed in it, you may have just let yourself become distracted with the dirty stains on it. But our God is a bleaching man...and all it takes is a stop with Him in His laundry shop. So get to it friends! Stop getting distracted, take a dip in his laundry shop today. and walk out in the glorious robes that He has for you! I am now off to get to my "to-do list," as I have started my day off right today! Day 1...check! :)

Lesson from a bird

As my last post stated, I recently went and got myself a parakeet from Pets Mart. If I was home enough, lived in an adequate living space, and had the money, I would by all means have myself a little farm. I love animals! So I went a got myself a little yellow bird (my favorite color) to help and indulge myself, yet in a semi-seemingly conservative way. The lady at Pets Mart told me that these birds were fairly young and not tame yet so I would have to tame him/her. So I have been working on trying to earn Woodstock's (his/her name) for almost 2 weeks now. Woodstock is easing up to me but he still hasn't fully decided to trust me yet. I have to wrestle him out of his cage every day just to try and have him sit on my finger. At first it was not a pretty sight as I spent most of the time just chasing him more than anything. But the past few days (as the pictures from the previous post show) he is finally sitting on my finger and shoulder and will stay put, so long as I don't move. Once he's out of the cage, he calms down a bit, but it is still a struggle to get him out. Well a few nights ago I was wrestling him to try and get him out of his cage so he could chill with me for a bit and we were having a particularly difficult struggle. I found myself saying to him, "Listen, Woodstock, why don't you just trust me? Would you really rather just sit in this cage all day? If you would only trust me, I would let you out to enjoy so much more and I would protect you. I just want to love you. Why are you being so difficult?" And then it was if God was sitting right there in the room with me and I heard Him say, so clearly in my Spirit..."Hmmm....that's funny, baby girl. I say the same thing to you. Why don't you just let me take you out of that little cage you have built around your heart and trust me that I only want to love you, protect you, and let you see just a little bit more life than you even imagined existed." I was speechless. I sat there for a moment and at first was motionless, and then I laughed. So true. For the most part, most of us find it fairly easy to accept Christ as our Savior. But to trust Him completely as our Lord, well thats another story. "Don't move us, God. I'm fine just right here." To which He sweetly replies, "But there is so much more ground for you to see and cover, my child." I struggle alongside High school kids daily in my ministry who fight this battle. And yet I am not all that different myself. Sure, I have taken many strides in my walk with Christ. And I will trust Him enough to sit on His finger for a bit every day. But will I let Him open my cage, take me outside, and trust that I can fly all around and yet know I am under His watchful eye? You see, it seems so simple for me when I'm trying to explain this to my bird (no, I don't talk to myself....He talks back in his own way! :)) But when I take a look at my own life, I realize that I still find myself sitting in my cage rather than on my Lord's shoulder from time to time. And all it's doing is confining me. This Lenten season may we be reminded of why He came. He came for you and for me and all b/c He is simply madly in love with us! Know whose you are...you are His...and He is good! Gotta go to a meeting.....