Fall

I woke up this morning to walk my dogs and discovered that it was half way decent outside as a bit of cool air brushed past me. It made me smile. Then I realized that it was pretty much fall! Fall is my absolute favorite time of year! If I could make a trip out to New England every time at this time of year, I would. I did it before with my bestie, Hanna, and it was amazing! Although we don't get it so much here, I love the fall leaves, apple orchards, crisp air, festivals, etc. The best I get here is a relief from the summer scorching humidity and that the Pumpkin Spice Lattes are back at Starbucks...my Fav's!!!! Can I get an amen please? :) They are so delightfully yummy! Try one as served, or my way: Triple, grande, non-fat, 2 pump, pumpkin spice latte with no whip but extra foam. High maintenance I tell you but so worth it. And if possible, hit up Maria at the Starbucks by the Ulta and Baybrook Mall. The absolute best. Ok, now that I am off my coffee speech, I will continue. Fall. I love fall! :) Perhaps it's because that even in death, there is still beauty. I found that statement profound enough that after I wrote it, I made it bold...ha. Feel free to quote me. But I probably stole that from someone else along the way. :) (Side note: I am now able to share my inspirations with you b/c I finally got internet yesterday! Woop-woop!) Ok, may my ADD self get it together. :) Anyways, the fall leaves (my fav) are perfect examples of beauty from death. As they die, they turn amazing shades of red, orange & yellow before they fall. And even though they die, it's only so new life may arise in just a short awhile. It's as Jesus said, "anyone who wants to TRULY live, must die to themselves." However, death is a hard process. It hurts. But it's so worth it. All I know is that even if it's painful, I don't want to be the same. I want to live! And if so, I must die. I have been having to die to myself a lot here recently. Die to a dream of how I want something to be, but can't force it to be. But it has been such a maturing process for me. I have realized that, as Max Lucado says, "If I want to go on with Jesus, the way goes through Gethsemane, through the city gate, and on 'outside the camp.' The way is lonely and goes on until there is no longer even a trace of a footprint to follow-but only the voice saying, 'Follow Me.'" Luke 22:28 also states, "You are those who have continued with Me in my trials." I want to continue with Jesus! Unfortunately, lots of times it's through trials. The way of the Kingdom can get lonely and hard, as Jesus Himself knew, but in it is life and beauty equally. My "fall colors" of beauty amist death right now are my fiance, Steven and the fact that I get to marry him soon-ministry with my YL kids-and sharing my joyous engagement with my loved ones. The rest is hard. But soon enough the death will be over and new life will appear! Hopefully and appropriately when my wedding is...which just happens to fall in the Spring! Jesus is so cool like that! :) That being said, the date is now set: March 19, 2011! (significant enough for some boldness too!) :) Things are finally starting to come together and I am so happy! :)
In conclusion, don't be afraid to die to yourself. For when you do, life is just right around the corner! Take some time today though to enjoy your "fall leaves" amist the pain. It's worth it. Like I, and Rocky, always say, "Nothing good ever comes easy!" :) I feel peace today and it feels good. Aaahh...
I love you.