I'm more of a realist than a dreamer. Therefore, I can lean towards thinking more negatively at times than positive and it's a fight for me. These past few weeks have been hard! After my last uplifting post (ha), Lillie caught a bad cold that I figured would pass quickly but it ended up lingering for over a week and during that time I caught it too and so we were both house bound, congested and feeling crummy! Just when I thought she was on the mend from that, she awoke a week later with a high fever that persisted for a couple of days. This past Saturday we took her to an urgent care clinic and they found no signs of infection from cold in Lillie. Praise Jesus for that but didn't take away the fact that she was still not eating, drinking, filled with a high fever and so weak. Dr. said that she had probably caught a virus after the cold and if the fever was still there Monday to take her to her Dr. b/c she could have a UTI. Well, it was still there yesterday so to the Dr. we went. I brought in my own urine sample of her so they wouldn't have to cath her and I was happy to find that they accepted it. Still no signs of infection in her so they tested her blood. No bacteria in blood (praise Jesus!) So off to the lab her urine went and we should find out results tomorrow. In the meantime, we still have a very weak, fever laden, little girl on our hands and it's dis-heartening. I was complaining to my husband about it yesterday...all the circumstances that are seemingly out of whack around me: A very expensive a/c unit on the fritz, my congestion still lingering, Lillie still sick for over 2 weeks now, sacrifices that abound surrounding pregnancy...you know...the normal woes of life...so he sweetly decided to leave work early yesterday and let me head to the gym for a much needed work out and break after 2 weeks! (Long sentence!) :) The first 30 minutes in were rough. I was still in complaining mode in my head, I was coughing so much that I had an asthma attack and then peed myself a bit (due to pregnant with 2nd child...hahaha...no shame here!) But I pushed through, blared the praise music into my headphones and finally felt some peace. Afterwards I headed to the grocery store to get a few, needed items and thats when I saw it...snow in Texas in July! Ok, so it didn't really snow. However, my part of Texas is known for it's Crete Mertel trees in the summer and they sure are pretty! This particular grocery store that I frequent has white ones planted on its premisis and yesterday was an unusually windy day so the little, white flowers were just gliding in the wind and looked just like snow! It was spectacular for me! I've been cooped inside for awhile now if you can't tell! :) Anywhow, thats when I felt God whisper in my spirit, "Child, I am not ignoring you. There are so many blessings among the difficulties right now that you are just choosing not to see and if you did, you would hold your head a little higher. For example, you always complain that Lillie doesn't cuddle but for the past 2 weeks that is all she has wanted to do with you. Furthermore, yes, your a/c unit is old but a repair man doing a courtesy check told you it was about to break. There are actually no problems as of now and your a/c is running fine. No need to worry. You have a/c. And in a few years when life gets crazy, you will long for the days when you could just sit and rock a sick baby, all the while feeling another one wiggle inside of you, with no demands of anywhere to be. In the mundane, I see your faithfulness and it matters." Aaahh...nothing like a sweet rebuke/gentle reminder from Jesus. I get it now, God. Thank you, Jesus! And it was then, that I danced in the snow...among all the heat and mosquitoes! :)
P.S. Prayers for Lillie still appreciated. Thanks! Updated pictures soon to come. Oh and we found out that I am having another girl by the way!!! Lillie will be a big sis sometime in November!